Personally, I think my body's going nutso on me. I sleep immediately after dinner (at around 9pm?), I wake up at 11.30pm, and I go back to bed at 12am. However, I couldn't sleep see. I kept tossing and turning and counting sheep. I read my reader's digest and played puzzle bobble just to try to get my eyes closed. Yeah the fear kept me awake, but fear of what? I don't know. Fear of the unknown perhaps?
It's just one of those nights when you hide under your blanket trying to imagine that there's no red lady standing behind your bed without eyes. It's another one of those nights where you ignore the shuffling of footsteps you hear outside the door; the knocking of the wall on your right. Well it's probably my neighbour knocking something onto his wall again. And when you go down into your blanket, you refuse to go back up because you're POSITIVE there's something on the ceiling that's going to stare right down at you and devour your soul or something. You can feel the drips of body fluids on your blanket, you get ready to use your phone to shine on it and say a prayer to cast the demon away, and the moment you throw your blanket off? Tada, it's morning for you. 6.00am and it was all a dream?!
Holy hell. Doesn't that suck so bad? My night was split up so much I can't make sense of it. Part of my memory remembers me in school, with Mr Marcus Tan yelling my name. I told him I was going to the LT to have a mass post-mortem on the comprehension we just did, and he said he knew. He just wanted to talk to me alone about my comprehension. He told me the mass post-mortem wouldn't help me and that I needed special attention.
At the same time, I remember myself throwing my guitar at the audience. I felt it as if it were soo real. I recognised the area as TJ hall and I saw banners saying - Black Lights. You know, the blogger default template? The top heading? The one which uses Courier New? Imagine that. Simply
Black Lights.
Yeah that was what I dreamt of, and of course the feeling of fear right before I slept. I don't lnow if that was right before I fell asleep the first time, or did I wake up in the middle of the night and feel that. But it was the exact same feeling of a crawler on the ceiling, of a hideous banshee right behind you, of simply nothingness coming to eat you up.
God, what a night. No wonder I'm up at 6. I don't usually wake up so early unless there's a need to, but today's special. I think I'm going to run. I'm usually not a runner but since I'm up so early and crap, might as well take the time to run and stuff.
Oh God it just dawned on me. The fear may be from the black lights dream. I know what I fear. I fear an empty audience, I fear it not coming to pass, I fear the bands not coming forth to play, I fear black lights itself.
Wow. Things you can realise while just staring at a bunch of words. Haha. Anyway, like I said, I'm going to run (I think) then come back and go biking with my friends. Whee! I'm going to ask my mum if she wants to run with me. If she wants to, she'll wake up. If not that'll be fine too! I'll just do some black lights stuff as well, buff up the sponsorship letters while waiting for the confirmed date. For some reason I feel that production has come to a halt again but rahhh. THE SHOW MUST GO ON!
Eugene.
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