godd save meee

shit la whats wrong with me

i guess i just am an asshole no one can go against that
taggers u can all just start spamming now and use my own words against me cos im already against myself

im such an idiot, irresponsible, stupid.

stupid

shant elaborate. 1 band 1, 4 band 2s and 3 band 3s. who got lower than me please raise up so that i knw i didnt get last in cohort. so far i dunno anyone as low as me.


irresponsible

i always believed that i could do everything. anything under the sun. accomplishment was no question to me. i could do EVERYTHING. superman. no im no superman. what bullshit was i thinking. i could do everything. fuck get off my ass.


idiot
everything else. goes in here.

shit la.. what have i been doing. why whenever i go to school i feel like im entering a prison. why is it everytime in class i feel so exasperated. not with anything else. not with anyone. but with myself. and worst thing is that whenever i feel this way people arnd me will be affected. take marcus for example. even tho cruiser was on my table and i wasnt like usin it at the moment.. i just wanted it there. sighs..

im sorry to all those i've offended in school.. sighs i guess i just wanted some time alone.. away frm the world. to be in a world of my own.. escape.. frm reality.. the reality of the world itself.. reality of all the things that men do.. stupid things.. like.. i dont know.. ah fuck. i jus.. dun get myself sometimes.. i feel that life is playing a big joke on me.. so many stupid things going on.. and i just wanna escape.. frm life..

suicide is.. no option. dont think abt it.. noo. yes it'll end life and all sufferings with it.. but no.. look at the amount of ppl u'll be hurtin with it.. parents, grandparents, sister.. millions of friends.. lim yi xiu.. sigh i wont die.

i just afraid that i die in my sleep. headache killin me.. plus sneezin. whenever i sneeze the headache triggers like a shotgun. ARCHU [BOOM].ARCHU [BOOM].ARCHU [BOOM]. then its like a rifle when im nt sneezeing..