hatred.. hate.. why all this.. unneccessary shit?

sighs. and i thought it was all over.

i dont see why people like to go on another person's tagboard and start going, "blabla. shit this shit that. fuck this fuck that. u suck u bitch. wad. my ass is worth more than ur face kinda thing." i have people i dont like myself. there was once, to an extent, hated a person. anione who knoes me probably knoes that i dont hate people much. so when i hate someone its a big piece of shit. yeah.. anyway.. i dont know why all this hate is going around. cant we all live in piece?

everyone has differences. no matter how close the two are, they're different in one way or another. siblings, even, are different. me and my sis for example. we're worlds apart. she likes hip-hop.. rap.. black music [no offence]. and i adore rock, all sorts of rock. be it punk rock. sentimental rock. pop rock..gothic rock? lol.. that'd be evanescence. whoa.. drifting off topic. ok ok. so we're worlds apart. yet i dont go to her tagboard and scream in her face, "i hate u, ur a bitch, u and ur stupid raps[no offence here again. im ok with rap. =p. jus example.], childish behaviour. blabla. rather go fuck a donkey than talk to u. wad nonsense blabla." lol. i dont do that shit.. not directing this to anyone, but seriously i think if u have a problem with the related person, i realli think u shld go to her face and talk to her nicely, maybe she'd change. i mean, whats the use of proclaiming ur hate?!

yeah, proclaiming hate doesnt work at all. if someone goes up to u and says, "u suck becos blablabla." i think we'd become more rebellious right? purposely dont do what the person says. like.. he ask us to go get a life. who bothers to listen to that shit? why make enemies? i rather we talk to the person nicely and try to mould the person into a better one. if the person is too talkative.. try to tell the person that, and maybe he/she'd change.. no use going, "bloody fucking blabbermouth. cant shutup isit. if i can measure the words u say by gallons, i think my elephant pee for one year also less than ur words for one day." that obviously wont change anyone right? that'll provoke the person further and probably after that the person will bear grudges.. whats the point? jus go to the person and talk things out nicely. or maybe even dun bother abt the person. yeah. isnt that great? then u dunnid to mix with the person. dunnid to do anything with the person, or have anything to do with the person. nid not hate the person specifically right? i find hate a waste of time.

im not posting this particularly to make some people feel bad, to make them feel guilty, to make them hate me. no no. i just.. wish for this hate to stop. is hate energy? where it cant be destroyed and only able to passed on into other forms? is hatred the power behind everything? why does everyone have to hate someone? if someone wld to come and scold me fuck and all this. yeah maybe if i was in a bad mood, it'd leave a bad impression. but if i was sane and sober, i'd just probably go home to think about the comment!

"eugene i dont like u becos ur fat ugly and stupid"

if someone said that to me, of cos i'd be hurt. but i mean.. i dont go and say, " yes ur stupid fat and ugly too. go away." i'd go home, and maybe on my way home i think abt what the person said. if what he/she said was true, i'd work on it! like. facial.. lala.. study.. lala.. go exercise and all.. lala. but if he was wrong, then i'd confront the person and ask him why he said that! i wldnt go and tag on his board, or blog on it, or whatever, "i hate u". everyone has a right to criticise. personal views, but the person being criticised must be able to take it. i dont see how anyone improves with criticism.

so basically im trying to be a neutral party which holds a banner saying : NO HATE! sighs.. i thought i made myself clear the last time when this hate shit went arnd.. its like.. i dont get it. im going to leave temasek with sad memories. "temasek sec is a place full of hate. lets not go back there anytime soon." i dont want to think like this. but if situation goes on.. i'd probably be discouraged frm coming back.discouraged by the fact that when i go back i'd have two different group of friends who hate each other.when i talk to this grp, the other grp detests. when i talk to the other grp. one detests. and in the end, im caught in the middle. man i wish i didnt have so many friends. people say things that they dont mean sometimes. "your a meanie." germaine. i thought about that. and yes. i have to agree. i am a meanie! so now eugene shall be known as a meanie who wont visit someone in the hospital due to certain reasons which he does not want to rake up again. yesyes. maybe that meanie statement wasnt so justified. but i am abit of a meanie. so there. she was right and wrong at the same time. germ.. i am not a total meanie. maybe 1/4. can i pls not be known as a meanie? i dont want to take my last step out temasek school gates thinking," this place is never the same again. never the same. the air is so cold." and whenever i think abt going back to tms? i think, "damned place full of hatred." pls.. dont give me that impression. make up and be friends. for my sake. please.. i want the school to be my family. my real family. pls. make up.

buying my guitar tomorrow.. 10am. roxy sq. Yamaha Pacifica PAC112J Sunburst colour $435.